3.18.2013

From The Series "Through A Symposium, Inattentive": Baseball Limericks

The following were written during a symposium I was forced to attend but in which I had no interest whatsoever. The following is of low quality.


A Limerick for Jake Arrieta

There was once a pitcher named Jake
Who wouldn't give Os fans a break.
One day he's lights-out,
The next it's a rout!
When hitters get on him, they rake!


A Limerick for Roberto Alomar

There once was a 2B named Robby,
Disliked by the umpires' lobby.
He played well all the same,
Got his piece of sports Fame.
When I look at BRob I get sobby.


A Limerick for Bobby Bonilla

There once was a guy named Bonilla.
Back in 2001, he said "See ya!"
While he split with the Mets,
He still cashes their checks--
What a deal! You'd have to agree, huh?


A Limerick for Justin Verlander

The Tigers have a fearsome pitcher
Who once threw a crazy no-hitter.
When the 9th inning gun
Reads a hundred and one,
You know that to start, no one's fitter.


A Limerick for Brian Roberts

Oh hey Brian Roberts, oh hey!
I notice your hair's kind of grey...
It looks pretty good!
But I still think you should
Forget about trying to play.


A Limerick for Chris Hoiles

Chris Hoiles was some kinda catcher,
Along with his pal Lenny Webster.
His powerful hands
Once crushed TWO grand slams
In one game! Was it awesome? You betcha!

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